All the Years

**Some grammar errors may occur. Too tired to proofread now, I just want to write something. Will make corrections later. Some themes do not match, but I just want to write these.

Since 2008, when I started this blog, there have been a lot of things that showed up and went away along my path. That was only (or has already been) five years ago, and career-wise I have not upped so much.

It's a little sad sometimes especially when you hear people's comment about how you could have been better, to dress up more like your age, or to find a job that's more rewarding. (note: mom) But really, why do these things matter?

I sometimes plan to do something about these things, like maybe fix my hair a little, put on a little make up, or try to find another job on the Internet. But for the past two years and more, my attention was caught by something else. Something I know is very important, which I cannot miss in this lifetime.

I even have to give up a lot of meetings with old friends, just to be with new people I've met. But these people, even if I don't know their background, why they are here, what food they like, and the funny moments in their lives, they know who they are, and for some reason, I know them too. Along the way, I feel like we are all trying to gradually get rid of these temporary clothes we are wearing.

It has been a long journey. I hope this is the last one. Even if sometimes my old consciousness is dragging me back to the pits of human life, I still always want to remember my real purpose for crawling and walking along this Earth, and to beat it.

Along the way, pains try to urge me to give up and happiness makes me linger unnecessarily. But I have to realize that both these things are mere seasons in my life, and they need to pass. no reason to dwell on these.

Last year, I planned for things which should have come up at the beginning of the year, but didn't happen. Yet, it's okay, I'll just plan and let things unfold on its own depending on what I deserve. We all deserve something—whether it is good or bad. But in the end, one must hope to get out of the cycle and find their true love.

Five Years Story

Chapter One

hehe, ok.

question,

(xxx) pano mo nakikita ang sarili mo, 5yrs from now?

at ano ang tunay at ultimate mong pangarap para sa sarili mo?

Chapter Two

Ako? 5 years from now, graduate na si (xxx).
ang ultimate kong pangarap? makagrad si (xxx). tas makasama ang pamilya ko sa langit. o kahit ako lang, if ever malimutan ko sila, pero habang nabubuhay ako ay ang maging mas masaya ang bawat taon ko..

Chapter Three

hehe, mukhang stressed na stressed ka sa school ni (xxx) ah.

umuulan ba dyan? hehe.

good afternoon :)

Chapter Four

di naman. pero yun lang naiisip ko. after niya grumaduate, pwede na ko magtour sa ibang bansa. kung may pera. haha.


bat mo naman naisip? magpapakasal ka na ba within 5 years? ehehe.

Chapter Five

nyak. ayoko magkaron ng responsibilidad

gusto ko magstay lang sa bahay at maglaro ng PS3, kahit wala kami nun. 

gusto ko magretire ng maaga.. tas magipon ng pera, para hindi ko na kailangang magtrabaho.

Chapter Six

di ba dapat mag ipon ka muna bago magretire?
ayoko tumigil sa pagtatrabaho. kahit ano. basta dapat may gingawa ako. na paiba iba.

Chapter Seven

ay oo, baliktad pala.
gusto ko mag-ipon, then magretire.
basta, gusto ko maging masaya.
matagal ko ng di nararamdaman yung ganong pakiramdam.
magiging masaya ako, pero saglit lang.
eheh. siguro nega lang ako madalas.

Chapter Eight

nasasaid na siguro ang sense of humor mo.
kailangan mong mag-recharge.


sabi nga nila. happiness is a choice.

Chapter Nine

hmm... true, true.

The song "Kanlungan" is playing right now. And it never fails to stir in snippets of my happy yesterday.(The days you know that will never ever happen again.)

I'm not saying that I'll never be happy again tomorrow or the next month or in the far future.

In fact, I'm contentedly happy these days. As my present mantra goes like this:

Masaya na ko sa mga panahong ito. lahat ng kailangan ko ay nandito na: Pamilya, mga kaibigan, sweldo sa ATM, crush at pangarap.

Though these things may fail sometimes, still, being contented with what you have brings happiness.

And, back to my initial proposition, sadness hits you when you remember people who had been part of your life for a very short time and you know will never be again by your side because you are not only divided by oceans and mountains, but divided by years as well. The same laughter and happiness won't strike you again. You can never laugh and cry about the very same things. Some other humorous things might be there to meet you, but the old ones, they're gone forever, etched in your memory.

But how many memories can our 150-pound noggin handle?

In the next few years, I'll surely remember the happiness I feel right now, but will I still remember then the memories I have right now? Will they be overwritten?  Like the messages in your inbox?

The technology will fail us. We can't rely on twitter, or skype or even emails to continuously communicate with yesterday, hoping to hold on to the future. So the tangible and written reminders, I will keep.

very very strawvery. I won't forget that.


I hope.

So my daily verse now goes:

Masaya na ko sa mga panahong ito. lahat ng kailangan ko ay nandito na: Pamilya, mga kaibigan, sweldo sa ATM, crush, pangarap, at mga ala-ala.

Hey Christmas, are you coming soon?

Today’s the first day of September and every body’s gushing cuz Christmas is coming.

It’s normal that even on rainy days like these, when the first day of the –ber months has arrived, people will automatically disregard the weather condition and take time to breathe the air that is Christmas.

You’ll suddenly hear Christmas songs and TV segments will start featuring anything about Christmas—from decors, gift selection and preparation, food for parties and all sort of things related to “tis season to be jolly”.

Christmas’s core meaning for me is love. What else can it be? And with love there is forgiveness, care, patience, and every good thing you can think of—even chocolate.

Aside from the reminder that Christmas season has started today, many things are making me smile too, even though my face is attacked by nasty and swollen pimples these past few weeks.

I might have troubled heart from time to time, but I just can’t help but smile whenever good things associated with Christmas come by.

MerrY CHristMas!